


obi-wan fell

by orphan_account



Series: my master [2]
Category: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: M/M, Sith!Obi-Wan, pre- my master
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-28
Updated: 2020-02-28
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:27:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22943275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: He knew his name before he knew anything else. My apprentice, Obi-Wan.The words rolled off Qui-Gon’s lips in distaste, as if saying the name was punishment enough. For young Anakin’s eyes, it was nothing.  Qui-Gon spoke lowly of his apprentice that Anakin feared to meet the treacherous beast of a padawan.Anakin was met with gentle eyes and a kind smile.
Relationships: (Kind of) - Relationship, Obi-Wan Kenobi/Anakin Skywalker, Qui-Gon Jinn/Obi-Wan Kenobi
Series: my master [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1647724
Comments: 3
Kudos: 213





	obi-wan fell

**Author's Note:**

> This is the prequel to my master. It can be read alone. It’s also set in Anakin’s POV. Enjoy!
> 
> You can find me on tumblr @/obewenkenobi

He knew his name before he knew anything else. _My apprentice, Obi-Wan._

The words rolled off Qui-Gon’s lips in distaste, as if saying the name was punishment enough. For young Anakin’s eyes, it was nothing. Qui-Gon spoke lowly of his apprentice that Anakin feared to meet the treacherous beast of a padawan. 

Anakin was met with gentle eyes and a kind smile. 

-

Anakin was a slave his whole life, he knew nothing else but his mother’s voice would ring in his ears. _My boy, you are meant to do something great._

Maybe the greatness of Anakin Skywalker was to be a slave. Maybe the greatness of Anakin Skywalker had yet to be shown. 

Bruised, tortured, and abused, was all Anakin knew. Qui-Gon Jinn entered his life. 

-

Qui-Gon wanted him, he wanted him like Watto had wanted a strong young boy as a slave. Anakin knew what it felt like to be wanted, but never for the right reasons. 

He saw her first. She was beautiful to the eyes of a young boy who had never seen anything in her likes. _A Handmaiden._

She was easy to talk to, young Anakin realized. She called him ‘Ani’ like his mother before him. She didn’t treat him as the child he was, but rather, the adult he would become. He knew, in his heart of hearts, that he would marry that girl.

He left his mother. He left his mother behind with a beautiful Handmaiden and a powerful Jedi, also a creature that he couldn’t decipher. They made it towards the now fixed ship, where a boy- a Jedi, aswell- stood.

Anakin smiled at him and it was returned. This couldn’t possible be the monster of an apprentice, Anakin thought, surely not.

It was. Obi-Wan, he announced himself. He spoke to Anakin like Padme, in full sentences and as if he wasn’t a child. Anakin decided that he loved him. 

-

It is to be noted that on the way from Tattoonie to Coruscant, that after Obi-Wan spoke to Qui-Gon, that the Force shifted. It shifted in a bad turn, and the gentle smiles Obi-Wan would give him now turned into harsh glares. He would ignore young Anakin when he walked in the room and in the night, he would turn to Padme, and ask. “Does Obi-Wan hate me?”

And Padme, she would hold him in her arms, and say, “Of course not, Ani.”

If tears slipped from his eyes, neither of them spoke of it.

-

When Anakin walked in the Temple, he would here whispers. _Chosen One._ The Council said he was too old, untrainable but Qui-Gon refused. He would say, “I will train the boy.” 

Then Anakin, he would feel a swell in his chest at the thought of being wanted. He would turn to Obi-Wan, and he would see a sad boy underneath his emotionless face. Young Anakin wished they would mourn for Obi-Wan, and not him.

-

Maul appeared and he was defeated. Qui-Gon Jinn came back with scratches and bruises. Obi-Wan Kenobi came back with hatred and anger. 

They could feel it, the whole Temple could. Anakin couldn’t understand the dark, uneasy Force that surrounded them. His mind unable to comprehend.

He heard whispers after that, whispers of Obi-Wan’s hatred for his Master. That during the fall of Maul, went their relationship with it. 

It was not spoken of, what happened during that battle. It never had.

Anakin would try to speak to Obi-Wan, but the older man would hear nothing of it. After the battle, he refused to hold back his hatred for the boy. He would snap at him, as if he was a child, with eyes that flicked yellow.

Anakin never forgot the shade of blue, though. He never forgot the love he felt for the man.

He just wished he could have saved him somehow. 

-

The death of Obi-Wan Kenobi went a little like this. 

Qui-Gon would sit Anakin down, and tell him. He would say, “There are only five stages of the Jedi Trials. Obi-Wan will pass them all but one.”

Anakin felt nervous, he felt scared for the boy who didn’t know what was coming. “Why not, Master?”

“The Trial of The Spirit.” Qui-Gon explained. “Obi-Wan feels too much, he has too much attachment. He has too much anger rising in him. It will be his fall, Anakin.”

Anakin would leap up. “Well, we must warn him, Master.”

And Qui-Gon, he would sit back, a smile on his face. He would shake his head. “I can’t save Obi-Wan, and neither can you. He belongs to the Force now.”

In the night, Anakin would walk to Qui-Gon, with his eyes filled with tears. “What will happen to him, Master?” He would ask, his words would be slurred.

Qui-Gon would stare at him. No sorrow in his eyes, and that would break Anakin’s heart. “He will belong to the Force.”

“Will he die?” Anakin would ask, impatiently. 

Qui-Gon would say nothing. It was a night to mourn, Anakin decided, for a boy not yet gone.

Two days later, Master Yoda came to them both in the sunshine of the morning. He would come and say that padawan Obi-Wan did not make it. He would say that the boy died. 

The Temple mourned silently. All except, his Master.

-

Obi-Wan lived in Anakin’s mind. He lived in his mind while he was with Padme, he lived in his mind while he was dreaming, he lived in his mind, _always._

Anakin was seventeen, when he went to his Master and he would ask, “Do you ever think of Obi-Wan?”

And his Master, he would turn to him and stare. “Who?”

Anakin’s heart would break all over again.

  
  


-

When they met again, it was as if the Force was granting him a wish. A wish that a young boy made. A wish that a man made.

“Obi-Wan,” he would whisper, but he wanted to say, _Obi-Wan, you are alive. I missed you._

“We thought you died,” he would say, but he wanted to say, _I mourned for you, Obi-Wan. I missed you._

“No, Obi, you did that yourself,” he would say, but he wanted to say, _I wish I could have saved you, Obi-Wan. I missed you._

When he felt the touch of the man who he had cried for, he wanted to cry again. He wanted to cry and say _Touch me, please. I need your touch, Obi-Wan. Show me you are alive. Obi-Wan, did you miss me?_

It was a flash and he thought he was dreaming, he could only feel Obi-Wan. He could feel the heat of his anger, he could feel all of him, and he wanted, oh, more than anything, to hold the boy once forgotten. Obi-Wan would touch him, and he would melt. He would melt as if he was ice cube, and Obi-Wan was the sun. He would gasp and he would moan, and he wanted it to stop but _No, Obi-Wan, do not ever stop._

The feelings he felt for the man were unexplainable. The Sith Lord hated him, it was easy to tell but the Force would whisper to him, _he needs to be loved._

Anakin knew what it felt like to be loved. He was loved by many; his mother, Qui-Gon, Padme. He then decided that he would love, and love Obi-Wan, and Obi-Wan could hate, and hate him but Anakin would only love.

It was soon realized, after the gut emptiness of Obi-Wan’s disappearance and the Force tingling in the air, that Obi-Wan and Anakin had bonded. Later on, they would say they didn’t know how it happened but Anakin knew. He knew when the Force whispered to him on cold nights. He knew when the Force told him that he was to _love_ this broken man. 

And if there is one thing his Master told him, it was to always listen to the Force. “Let the Force guide you, young Padawan.”

Anakin had to listen. 

Maybe it’s the reason why he lied to his Master. Maybe it’s the reason in the night, he yearned for the Sith’s touch and not his lover back home. Maybe that's why he found him again.

  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
